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What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Alder - 3/1/2026
He spent the night alone.
A part of him desperately craved Solvi’s company, longing to hear the soft chime of her laughter and gentle words coaxing him back into some semblance of normal again, but the hour had grown late, far too late, and he couldn’t bring himself to rouse her.
The moon had long reached the apex of its journey in the sky and had already begun to fade from view, and Alder sat at the outskirts of the Vale as he watched the first light of dawn color the horizon.
How beautiful the world could be, he thought; so then why - why -
Solvi always rose early. She was a creature of the sun, and anyway, he wanted her to be the first to know - before anyone else discovered the body. Alder heaved himself up on numb legs, legs that seemed so disconnected from the rest of him, and noted distantly the constant stream of blood that leaked from the deep gashes Cypress had branded across his right forelimb.
More wounds lay scattered haphazardly across the canvas of his large form; a bite here, some scratches there, bits of missing fur. He probably looked like shit, he thought.
Alder tried to wash the dried blood away from his maw in a nearby stream, but he could tell it was no use - the water was too cold, the crimson had seeped too deep. It would be days before the taste of Cypress was out of his mouth for good.
Bleeding, he limped into the Vale and toward the den-site where he knew Solvi would be just waking from her dreams, and he hoped they had been beautiful. There was a part of Alder that regretted the little Solskin having to see him this way, beat to hell and covered in fresh injuries, but there was nothing else for it. He didn’t have time to see a healer; he had gone straight from Cypress’ corpse at the base of Northfall to the Vale.
... Solvi,he called hoarsely, softly, not wishing to rouse the others or draw unnecessary attention.
Are you awake?
Delayed exhaustion finally caught up to him, and Alder felt his lower half partially collapse into the melting snow as blood pooled below his leg.
Empty.
The space inside his chest - it felt so empty.
Just how much had Cypress taken from him, even in death?
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Solvi - 3/1/2026
![[Image: viv_honeybee.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/viv_honeybee.gif)
SKILL : Doctor ( 1 / 5 )
As though having received his quiet whim, the realm of Solvi's dreams was filled with hours whiled away at the riverbank. Fish flowed easily, readily, and succumbed to their strange penchant for battling one another to the shores. She did not have to understand the odd behavior The Mother had given them to accept the offering - she stacked them in piles that nearly reached her shoulder in height, and she was abuzz with excitement. Already, she was thinking of all the different herb combinations she was going to try; she was certain Tiberii would be thrilled to be her taste tester. The real challenge would be bringing them all back to the heart of the Vale ... but where there was a will, there was a way.
On the next motion to drag a wriggling fish in, however, the river began to change. The smell of blood clotted in her nose and the surging waters rushed red; the edges foamed, thick and sanguine, across the rocks and her paws began to slide, the pale fibers rapidly dyed pink. The gasp that slipped past her lips released the fish she held and she stepped back hastily, nearly stumbling over her own paws. It was so much blood - too much blood - more than the fish could have held if she were to bleed them outright.
Panic rose within her chest as she stared with wide eyes at the river, a red ribbon in the growing gloom. She hadn't noticed the sun had disappeared so quickly, the final light of dusk casting a harsh tint to the world. Yet, the water seemed to glow - not the welcoming light of first dawn or the glittering sunlight cast through treetops, but the ominous pulse of promised doom.
Evil.
It reminded her of the cave ... the one she had visited with Amaranth. The one that foretold a demise most grisly.
"Solvi."
Alder's voice reached her, muffled by the distance, and her ears pressed forward, straining against the thunder of her heartbeat as she sought to hold the notes captive. As she turned away from the river, her eyes opened in the waking world and the dark interior of her den coalesced around her. Her stashes of herbs and other baubles caught hints of light as early morning light filtered in, filament by filament. She could hear Bjarki's quiet snores from her side and she breathed a sigh of relief to find herself home rather than the river in this moment. Solvi could almost shrug the unfortunate dream away, curling further into herself and dragging her tail over Bjarki in as much a measure to keep him warm as to remind herself she was in this moment, not the one she had woken from.
On the next inhale, the scent of blood persisted.
And with it, Alder's voice - real, and close.
Her head rose sharply, the fur on one side of her face slanted from where it had rested on the earth. Elsewhere, cowlicks and otherwise unruly fur flicked in directions it shouldn't - drool summoned by the promise of endless salmon in her dream did not help her disheveled appearance.
But none of that mattered, not when Alder and blood were present in the same space - especially not when she did not detect notes of prey.
What was he doing in the Vale at this hour?
Solvi shoved to her paws, rolling Bjarki away in the process by accident; he muttered something sleepily about the "lack of respect around here" as he huddled back into the bear pelt and threw her a sharp look. She placed a hasty pin in the thought of offering him an apology later.
Right now, she had more pressing matters to attend than a raccoon's bruised ego. She exited the den and, though she wasn't sure what she expected to see, her heart clenched at the sight.
The red of Alder's coat bled with abandon, wounds both frank and hidden by his coat. Beneath his leg where he sat, the circle of blood grew.
Had he come from Northfall like this? Or had it happened closer to the Vale? Furthermore-
It troubled her to see him harmed - more than it should. Her oath called on the promise of equality; she was supposed to see each patient as just as important as the next and last, but ... This was Alder. She had attended the Northfall celebration to serve as a healer, but it hadn't just been that. Solvi had also gone to support Alder and, should he be injured, she intended to be sure he received the best care.
There were not many things Solvi was prideful over, but her healing ability was one skill she was confident in.
All the same, it shook the tenants of her oath to be so preferential ... but she wasn't as disappointed in herself as she felt she ought to be.
To actually see him injured ... she grappled, poorly, with the battering of her heartbeat, the jittery adrenaline that fizzed just on the edge of panic. The honeybee attempted to mask some of it, smoothing some of the creases in her expression, but her gaze was not so successful as she implored him for an explanation that would guide his care.
On the next motion to drag a wriggling fish in, however, the river began to change. The smell of blood clotted in her nose and the surging waters rushed red; the edges foamed, thick and sanguine, across the rocks and her paws began to slide, the pale fibers rapidly dyed pink. The gasp that slipped past her lips released the fish she held and she stepped back hastily, nearly stumbling over her own paws. It was so much blood - too much blood - more than the fish could have held if she were to bleed them outright.
Panic rose within her chest as she stared with wide eyes at the river, a red ribbon in the growing gloom. She hadn't noticed the sun had disappeared so quickly, the final light of dusk casting a harsh tint to the world. Yet, the water seemed to glow - not the welcoming light of first dawn or the glittering sunlight cast through treetops, but the ominous pulse of promised doom.
Evil.
It reminded her of the cave ... the one she had visited with Amaranth. The one that foretold a demise most grisly.
"Solvi."
Alder's voice reached her, muffled by the distance, and her ears pressed forward, straining against the thunder of her heartbeat as she sought to hold the notes captive. As she turned away from the river, her eyes opened in the waking world and the dark interior of her den coalesced around her. Her stashes of herbs and other baubles caught hints of light as early morning light filtered in, filament by filament. She could hear Bjarki's quiet snores from her side and she breathed a sigh of relief to find herself home rather than the river in this moment. Solvi could almost shrug the unfortunate dream away, curling further into herself and dragging her tail over Bjarki in as much a measure to keep him warm as to remind herself she was in this moment, not the one she had woken from.
On the next inhale, the scent of blood persisted.
And with it, Alder's voice - real, and close.
Her head rose sharply, the fur on one side of her face slanted from where it had rested on the earth. Elsewhere, cowlicks and otherwise unruly fur flicked in directions it shouldn't - drool summoned by the promise of endless salmon in her dream did not help her disheveled appearance.
But none of that mattered, not when Alder and blood were present in the same space - especially not when she did not detect notes of prey.
Alder?she returned, tongue slurred by the dredges of sleep and, somehow, also the adrenaline of panic. It was as though the syllables were all traveling at high velocity, but bottlenecking just as they got to their destination.
Yes-
What was he doing in the Vale at this hour?
Solvi shoved to her paws, rolling Bjarki away in the process by accident; he muttered something sleepily about the "lack of respect around here" as he huddled back into the bear pelt and threw her a sharp look. She placed a hasty pin in the thought of offering him an apology later.
Right now, she had more pressing matters to attend than a raccoon's bruised ego. She exited the den and, though she wasn't sure what she expected to see, her heart clenched at the sight.
The red of Alder's coat bled with abandon, wounds both frank and hidden by his coat. Beneath his leg where he sat, the circle of blood grew.
Wh-she began, the question cut short as her throat tightened, her heart seeming to occupy the narrow channel of her larynx. Her brows were knit with open concern she did not attempt to rein in, for she knew she would have been unsuccessful. She pressed forward, not waiting for an invitation to do so, and came to a rest just to his side - the side with his most injured leg. One front paw hovered just above the snow, as though she could not make up her mind whether to retreat to her bay for supplies or try to get him physically settled first.
Had he come from Northfall like this? Or had it happened closer to the Vale? Furthermore-
What happened?she managed finally, the query quiet but pressing. Her gaze lifted to meet his, her mind already swirling with the implements and herbs she would be needing. It was not a question of if he wanted her help, she would not take "no" for an answer in this instance.
How long have you been walking on that leg?
It troubled her to see him harmed - more than it should. Her oath called on the promise of equality; she was supposed to see each patient as just as important as the next and last, but ... This was Alder. She had attended the Northfall celebration to serve as a healer, but it hadn't just been that. Solvi had also gone to support Alder and, should he be injured, she intended to be sure he received the best care.
There were not many things Solvi was prideful over, but her healing ability was one skill she was confident in.
All the same, it shook the tenants of her oath to be so preferential ... but she wasn't as disappointed in herself as she felt she ought to be.
To actually see him injured ... she grappled, poorly, with the battering of her heartbeat, the jittery adrenaline that fizzed just on the edge of panic. The honeybee attempted to mask some of it, smoothing some of the creases in her expression, but her gaze was not so successful as she implored him for an explanation that would guide his care.
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Alder - 3/1/2026
Even disheveled and freshly woken from a deep slumber, she was beautiful. If anything, the little crust of drool at the corner of her lip made her even more endearing - that such a perfect creature could still be as mortal as he in dreams.
He felt a wave of guilt; Alder knew his wound could have at least lasted until after sunrise. It was only his own selfish neediness to see her that roused Solvi at this unspeakable hour, the world still dark around them as even the sky struggled to wake overhead.
The pain in his foreleg seemed so distant now. Just being near her was enough - the sylph's warmth extended well beyond her gentle tone and kindly expression, exuding from her very being like a much-needed salve.
How foreign his own voice sounded, uttering those words.
She asked how long he’d been walking - he couldn't come up with an answer. Time held no meaning since the light had died at last in his grandfather's eyes, eyes so full of hate. Full of spite. Taunting, even to the bitter end; his blood had tasted like ash in Alder's mouth.
The sky continued to lighten.
His jaw clenched.
He felt a wave of guilt; Alder knew his wound could have at least lasted until after sunrise. It was only his own selfish neediness to see her that roused Solvi at this unspeakable hour, the world still dark around them as even the sky struggled to wake overhead.
The pain in his foreleg seemed so distant now. Just being near her was enough - the sylph's warmth extended well beyond her gentle tone and kindly expression, exuding from her very being like a much-needed salve.
He's dead.
How foreign his own voice sounded, uttering those words.
She asked how long he’d been walking - he couldn't come up with an answer. Time held no meaning since the light had died at last in his grandfather's eyes, eyes so full of hate. Full of spite. Taunting, even to the bitter end; his blood had tasted like ash in Alder's mouth.
It's not - it’s not bad, Solvi,he said, resisting the urge to pull away from her worried gaze. The guilt returned anew, and he became acutely aware of how much he hated needing things, needing others, but he couldn’t deny that in this moment he needed her more desperately than he had anything else in the world.
Cypress got a good one in, I guess. Locked his jaws and wouldn't let go. Stubborn bastard.
The sky continued to lighten.
I've always wanted to believe in the gods,Alder said suddenly, his gaze fixated on the pale horizon as all the while a steady trickle of crimson wept from the open wound on his leg.
I want to believe a higher power exists, and that there is a divine punishment in the end.
His jaw clenched.
If only for him.
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Solvi - 3/1/2026
SKILL : Doctor ( 2 / 5 )
The time of day meant nothing to her, not when Alder appeared to her ailing and bleeding. He could have woken her at any time on any day, intruded upon anything at all, and she would have answered his summons without hesitation. Had she any inkling of his guilt for having stirred her, she would have quickly banished the thought - she was relieved he was there, though she wished his condition had been less worrisome.
The words paused her motions just as she began to crane her neck down to investigate his leg further. For a moment, her brain struggled to find the dots to connect the meaning. She did not wonder for long, however, as the synapses she needed fired and she realized who he meant: Cypress.
This knowledge plunged her heart in ice - not for the fallen wolf, but for the one before her. The words hadn't been spoken with pride; they were empty shells carrying a message but little else. Each sound was detached in a way that did not suit him, not when he stumbled over his words so often in what seemed like an effort to say the right thing.
The Mother had imparted Her chosen with such choice; when Her tenets were besmirched and not even Her righteousness could dissuade kin from turning fang to kin. Those measures brought Solvi no warmth, but she was not foolish enough to think the world operated on rainbows and sit-down discussions that resolved every problem.
She was keenly aware of the stretch of scarred skin across her thigh - the result of teeth shorn through the flesh of kindness for vindictive reasons she hadn't even been party to. Many had suffered worse than she - her luck, if one could call it that, was not lost on her. It wasn't up to Solvi to decide who should live and who should die, but there was a part of her that was certain the world was safer, perhaps even a little brighter, with Cypress gone.
She studied Alder quietly, though not with judgment. The honeybee searched his expression for where his mind was, his condition beyond the physical. As he contested the severity of his injuries, her own visage shifted a shade to indicate she did not subscribe to his belief - she would accept it when she saw it clearly for herself. It was better to overextend caution than to pay the price in a stealthy infection.
Her gaze stayed on him, even as he spoke of his want to believe in something holy. Solvi pondered what her life would have been like without her carefully stacked beliefs. It ferried her through her darkest hours, providing answers and guidance hidden inside the minor details of daily life. Without it, she would have surely faltered before now.
Wordlessly, she pressed her side to his. She didn't mind what blood might smudge against her fur as a result, seeking only to anchor him. Had she not been frayed by concern for his wellbeing, she might have been distinctly and horribly conscious of their proximity.
It would be a terrible fate, she thought, to be alone, hungry, and in a world rendered dark for time immaterial - it fought against everything that wolfkind clung to.
Solvi nudged his shoulder with the side of her muzzle before she tipped her nose toward the small clearing that served as her medical bay. It wasn't much; an outcropping of stone, smaller rocks, and now-barren vegetation she allowed to grow freely at its edges to provide coverage, but it was more spacious than her den - unfortunately, she feared he might not be able to get even his front quarters through the smaller den she shared with a raccoon.
She would feel better once he was settled and she had done all she could to treat the bite and any other nicks across his frame. Until then, thorns of worry wrapped around her chest.
The words paused her motions just as she began to crane her neck down to investigate his leg further. For a moment, her brain struggled to find the dots to connect the meaning. She did not wonder for long, however, as the synapses she needed fired and she realized who he meant: Cypress.
This knowledge plunged her heart in ice - not for the fallen wolf, but for the one before her. The words hadn't been spoken with pride; they were empty shells carrying a message but little else. Each sound was detached in a way that did not suit him, not when he stumbled over his words so often in what seemed like an effort to say the right thing.
Cypress,she said, her tone even as she spoke the name in confirmation rather than question. There was no one else who would have earned a death sentence from Alder.
The Mother had imparted Her chosen with such choice; when Her tenets were besmirched and not even Her righteousness could dissuade kin from turning fang to kin. Those measures brought Solvi no warmth, but she was not foolish enough to think the world operated on rainbows and sit-down discussions that resolved every problem.
She was keenly aware of the stretch of scarred skin across her thigh - the result of teeth shorn through the flesh of kindness for vindictive reasons she hadn't even been party to. Many had suffered worse than she - her luck, if one could call it that, was not lost on her. It wasn't up to Solvi to decide who should live and who should die, but there was a part of her that was certain the world was safer, perhaps even a little brighter, with Cypress gone.
She studied Alder quietly, though not with judgment. The honeybee searched his expression for where his mind was, his condition beyond the physical. As he contested the severity of his injuries, her own visage shifted a shade to indicate she did not subscribe to his belief - she would accept it when she saw it clearly for herself. It was better to overextend caution than to pay the price in a stealthy infection.
Her gaze stayed on him, even as he spoke of his want to believe in something holy. Solvi pondered what her life would have been like without her carefully stacked beliefs. It ferried her through her darkest hours, providing answers and guidance hidden inside the minor details of daily life. Without it, she would have surely faltered before now.
Wordlessly, she pressed her side to his. She didn't mind what blood might smudge against her fur as a result, seeking only to anchor him. Had she not been frayed by concern for his wellbeing, she might have been distinctly and horribly conscious of their proximity.
I do not know of your mothers' Five,Solvi offered.
But The Mother forbids those who stray so wholly from entry to paradise. They will find their mouths dry and their stomachs empty, within a world dark and devoid of life, for time unending.
It would be a terrible fate, she thought, to be alone, hungry, and in a world rendered dark for time immaterial - it fought against everything that wolfkind clung to.
I think he will find the fate he deserves, as we all do,she added.
You have delivered him to it, and given peace to others.
Solvi nudged his shoulder with the side of her muzzle before she tipped her nose toward the small clearing that served as her medical bay. It wasn't much; an outcropping of stone, smaller rocks, and now-barren vegetation she allowed to grow freely at its edges to provide coverage, but it was more spacious than her den - unfortunately, she feared he might not be able to get even his front quarters through the smaller den she shared with a raccoon.
You need to get off that leg,she stated, her words gentle and not yet bossy, but she was fully prepared to be more firm if he resisted. Her eyes held his, imploring.
I know you do not think your injuries need attention, but humor me - please?
She would feel better once he was settled and she had done all she could to treat the bite and any other nicks across his frame. Until then, thorns of worry wrapped around her chest.
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Alder - 3/1/2026
Every fiber of his being rejected aid. To be on the receiving end of help was to admit weakness, admitting needing someone; Alder had always preferred to be as independent as he could, for if he required nothing from no one, he could never be let down. Never be beholden.
The world was a simpler place when it was only him, and his problems only belonged to him.
Yet how beautifully Solvi's eyes shone in the gentle dawn, and then the first rays of sunlight threaded their way through the clouds and touched upon her face like a golden crown. Anyone else he would have turned down entirely - for how deeply he despised himself! - but because it was she who requested it, he could deny her nothing.
Alder swallowed his pride, picking himself up and following the direction she set. He limped toward the clearing with as much dignity as he could muster, but it was clear he favored the wounded limb and his gait was awkward and unsteady.
With a final grunt, he proffered the injured leg as he averted his eyes in embarrassment.
That sounds a lot like the Five's version of bleak eternity for assholes,he said, risking a glance back. A pensive expression overtook him briefly, and he paused.
I wonder if all beliefs are somehow connected to - something bigger, something from the beginning of time that makes them all make sense. An origin point of sorts.
Perhaps it was a silly thought, but rambling helped distract him from the moment. He felt almost shy beneath her medical ministrations, simultaneously wishing to make himself smaller, somehow take up less space, to be less of a burden; all his life he'd felt like an inconvenience, like too much and not enough at the same time.
But he could not hide from Solvi.
I -
Alder’s breath hitched, and the words did not come out.
... Thank you,he finished lamely.
That was not what he had wanted to say at all.
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Solvi - 3/1/2026
SKILL : Doctor ( 3 / 5 )
She awaited his decision with a soft, yet hopeful, gaze. While she was prepared to employ more dire tactics to sway him, relief threaded through her when he acquiesced to her request. Despite herself, her features brightened as the tension in her shoulders eased. Solvi hadn't realized she was holding a breath until she released it at her lungs' burning behest, her stature visibly relaxing.
She was definitely still going to have to use the stinging herbs, but maybe he'd think they weren't "the" stinging herbs and believe she took it easy on him instead. The Mother knew she wouldn't cause him pain if she did not need to.
The Hedgewitch recalled, not so distantly, that Alder had turned down her efforts to heal him after the tourney and she wondered idly what had changed between then and now. Of course, he had detected Aksel's scent on her which had perturbed him in that moment; her mind was given leash to wander for a moment as she assisted Alder to the healing bay, the quiet morning backdrop absent of sound beyond the quiet tide of their breaths, the pattern of his uneven gait, and her steady one at his side. She was smaller than him, but she would gladly do what she could to bolster him if he were to falter.
There had been things unsaid then, things neither of them could seem to summon to their tongues, but her heart stirred as she remembered he had compared her to the sun.
All too soon, and far before she could collect her thoughts, they arrived at their destination and the moment where she might have been able to touch on any of it had passed. He was injured, and that took precedence - not to mention he had undergone trauma beyond his body.
Her eyes dropped to the hyli around his neck and she couldn't bat away the little skip her heart did. He could have removed it after the tourney if he had wanted, but he didn't - Solvi wasn't sure what to do with all of these bits and bobs of information, so she quietly collected them into a coveted, hidden box for later scrutiny when she could scrape together the courage to dare hope.
She shifted gears, forbidding herself the space to ruminate further as she stepped into the role for which she had taken an oath. The strings of her previous world did not bind her here, but her commitment to healing and protecting the sanctity of life followed her everywhere she went; it was written into her heart and whispered into the fibers of her soul, such an intrinsic part of herself that she wasn’t sure where she began and it ended. Hedgewitches were the final barrier between life and death and, with The Mother's blessing, they could pluck all but those marked for certain demise from the clutches of thereafter.
Of course, she did not think Alder's wound was grievous enough to be life-threatening, but she would still use every last herb and poultice she had in her arsenal to ensure it never would be. She retrieved a few bunches of herbs from the cache neatly hidden away near the bay - astringents, cleansing herbs, pain remedies - before she returned to face Alder, their dry and leafy stems crowding the sides of her pale muzzle.
Had she gotten a few extras he probably didn't need? Yes. But she was taking no chances, brooking no potential for something to slip past her. Chief among her supplies was starflower - known as borage to those outside her homeland. She had been fortunate to find fresh specimens recently, apparently some of the first blooms of the year.
Alder, in typical fashion, seemed to avoid her gaze - that familiar shy nature of his rearing its head. A smile curved along her muzzle around the herbs she held, eyes softening.
She carefully placed some of the herbs on the ground as she sifted each of them into smaller groupings according to when she would need them, but nudged the periwinkle blooms with her nose.
She added,
Since she had arrived in Mythris, she hadn't spoken to many about her homelands and their beliefs - in the beginning, she dared not even speak Solskin's name to the air for fear she would be discovered and carted back to meet the fate her father's choices promised. The honeybee wasn't even certain she had opened up much of her past to her pack; it wasn't because she did not trust them all these months later, but it was easier to simply file it all as a part of the past never to be revisited.
But when it came to Alder, she felt compelled to share things she wouldn't ordinarily offer. She wanted him to understand her beyond the surface, to share things she had never spoken to other ears.
Before she could examine that detail more, she returned to her task with a steadying breath.
A fortifying breath she certainly needed as she realized she would have to clear the field of his wound before she could even apply any of the medicinal herbs. The long-suppressed awareness of their proximity finally filtered in like a tidal wave and her throat bobbed. It wasn't as though she hadn't licked others' wounds, and it never bothered her before, but the fact it was Alder made it seem infinitely different.
It didn't help.
It didn't help at all, but she steeled herself as she tended the wound. By The Mother's mercy, the taste of iron on her tongue and knowing the blood belonged to Alder managed to transform her awareness of him into a needling sensation in her chest like some sort of twisted alchemy. Even though it was just a bite wound, Solvi wasn't sure if she hated many things other than to know he was harmed. Even a pricked pawpad was more discomfort than she wanted to ever find him.
Her heart becoming a pincushion notwithstanding, she survived cleaning his wound and paused as he mentioned the similarities between the Five and The Mother. She hummed thoughtfully, focusing on the words and considering them as she forged ahead with the medicine she compounded with her teeth. Her motions were practiced and careful, precise with the depth of her training.
While Solskin did not often see guests, they tended to bring with them their own beliefs and viewpoints to share with those who inquired. She had always been fascinated and, while she was secure in her own system, she pondered the same thing Alder mused. The similarities were so obvious at times that she found it impossible for there to not be a type of commonality at the root.
The first set of herbs had stinging properties, an unfortunate effect from their debriding, but the rest to follow typically soothed the burn. By the time she applied the last layer, Bjarki had finally risen from the den and, after dispensing and slow up-and-down glance at Alder that bordered on unimpressed - which was more a byproduct of the early hour than any actual judgement - he used his strange hands to piece a scrap of hide around the wound at Solvi's request. A vine similar to the one he'd woven for Alder's necklace loosely held the hide in place, but would certainly unravel if moved much.
Still, it was more than Solvi was able to do with her stiffer paws and teeth. So long as it held the remedies in place for a little while, it would help as a temporary shield. Bjarki unceremoniously turned to his morning foraging in the nearby treetops, leaving the two of them to their own company once more.
She scraped her tongue against her incisors against the bitter taste of the herbs, though she was grateful they robbed her of the coppery tinge of blood. A small mercy.
Her ears cupped toward Alder as his words immediately halted, a kernel of fretfulness worrying she had somehow gotten the wound salve wrong despite months of tutelage and practice. Just as her lips parted to ask if he was uncomfortable, he thanked her.
Solvi's lips bowed into a soft smile instead as she shook her head.
She studied him quietly for a moment, trying not to be obvious in the way her eyes drank in the dawn's light mingling with the fiery strands of his fur under the guise of a healer's clinical assessment, before tacking on,
Thank you,Solvi told him quietly, taking up her post at his side before her tone laced with teasing.
I promise not to use the stinging herbs, since you agreed so easily.
She was definitely still going to have to use the stinging herbs, but maybe he'd think they weren't "the" stinging herbs and believe she took it easy on him instead. The Mother knew she wouldn't cause him pain if she did not need to.
The Hedgewitch recalled, not so distantly, that Alder had turned down her efforts to heal him after the tourney and she wondered idly what had changed between then and now. Of course, he had detected Aksel's scent on her which had perturbed him in that moment; her mind was given leash to wander for a moment as she assisted Alder to the healing bay, the quiet morning backdrop absent of sound beyond the quiet tide of their breaths, the pattern of his uneven gait, and her steady one at his side. She was smaller than him, but she would gladly do what she could to bolster him if he were to falter.
There had been things unsaid then, things neither of them could seem to summon to their tongues, but her heart stirred as she remembered he had compared her to the sun.
All too soon, and far before she could collect her thoughts, they arrived at their destination and the moment where she might have been able to touch on any of it had passed. He was injured, and that took precedence - not to mention he had undergone trauma beyond his body.
Her eyes dropped to the hyli around his neck and she couldn't bat away the little skip her heart did. He could have removed it after the tourney if he had wanted, but he didn't - Solvi wasn't sure what to do with all of these bits and bobs of information, so she quietly collected them into a coveted, hidden box for later scrutiny when she could scrape together the courage to dare hope.
She shifted gears, forbidding herself the space to ruminate further as she stepped into the role for which she had taken an oath. The strings of her previous world did not bind her here, but her commitment to healing and protecting the sanctity of life followed her everywhere she went; it was written into her heart and whispered into the fibers of her soul, such an intrinsic part of herself that she wasn’t sure where she began and it ended. Hedgewitches were the final barrier between life and death and, with The Mother's blessing, they could pluck all but those marked for certain demise from the clutches of thereafter.
Of course, she did not think Alder's wound was grievous enough to be life-threatening, but she would still use every last herb and poultice she had in her arsenal to ensure it never would be. She retrieved a few bunches of herbs from the cache neatly hidden away near the bay - astringents, cleansing herbs, pain remedies - before she returned to face Alder, their dry and leafy stems crowding the sides of her pale muzzle.
Had she gotten a few extras he probably didn't need? Yes. But she was taking no chances, brooking no potential for something to slip past her. Chief among her supplies was starflower - known as borage to those outside her homeland. She had been fortunate to find fresh specimens recently, apparently some of the first blooms of the year.
Alder, in typical fashion, seemed to avoid her gaze - that familiar shy nature of his rearing its head. A smile curved along her muzzle around the herbs she held, eyes softening.
She carefully placed some of the herbs on the ground as she sifted each of them into smaller groupings according to when she would need them, but nudged the periwinkle blooms with her nose.
Solskin calls these starflowers,Solvi explained patiently, hoping to gentle the edges of his nervousness - perhaps he, like so many others, held a negative relationship with healing efforts.
If Solskin's stories are to be believed, The Mother gave these to us during a plague that would have certainly claimed us all.
She added,
Should you ever find yourself with a fever or a wound like yours, eating some or chewing it up and applying on the wound will take care of it in a pinch.
Since she had arrived in Mythris, she hadn't spoken to many about her homelands and their beliefs - in the beginning, she dared not even speak Solskin's name to the air for fear she would be discovered and carted back to meet the fate her father's choices promised. The honeybee wasn't even certain she had opened up much of her past to her pack; it wasn't because she did not trust them all these months later, but it was easier to simply file it all as a part of the past never to be revisited.
But when it came to Alder, she felt compelled to share things she wouldn't ordinarily offer. She wanted him to understand her beyond the surface, to share things she had never spoken to other ears.
Before she could examine that detail more, she returned to her task with a steadying breath.
A fortifying breath she certainly needed as she realized she would have to clear the field of his wound before she could even apply any of the medicinal herbs. The long-suppressed awareness of their proximity finally filtered in like a tidal wave and her throat bobbed. It wasn't as though she hadn't licked others' wounds, and it never bothered her before, but the fact it was Alder made it seem infinitely different.
I have to clean the wound first, but then I can apply herbs and cover it,she explained, narrating her process as though it might offset her own awkwardness or the discordant tick of her heart that she was certain he would be able to hear.
It didn't help.
It didn't help at all, but she steeled herself as she tended the wound. By The Mother's mercy, the taste of iron on her tongue and knowing the blood belonged to Alder managed to transform her awareness of him into a needling sensation in her chest like some sort of twisted alchemy. Even though it was just a bite wound, Solvi wasn't sure if she hated many things other than to know he was harmed. Even a pricked pawpad was more discomfort than she wanted to ever find him.
Her heart becoming a pincushion notwithstanding, she survived cleaning his wound and paused as he mentioned the similarities between the Five and The Mother. She hummed thoughtfully, focusing on the words and considering them as she forged ahead with the medicine she compounded with her teeth. Her motions were practiced and careful, precise with the depth of her training.
I have wondered similarly myself sometimes,Solvi admitted between applying medicines.
I feel The Mother's presence in all things and I see Her in nature and the way of the world, but I do not think everyone else is wrong, either. We can all look at the same thing and find different meanings or give it different names.
While Solskin did not often see guests, they tended to bring with them their own beliefs and viewpoints to share with those who inquired. She had always been fascinated and, while she was secure in her own system, she pondered the same thing Alder mused. The similarities were so obvious at times that she found it impossible for there to not be a type of commonality at the root.
It would not surprise me to learn we all share the same 'bleak eternity' for assholes,she added, giggling as she spoke the final word, which was woven almost conspiratorially as though she was saying something she shouldn't. Tiberii would be so proud of her.
The first set of herbs had stinging properties, an unfortunate effect from their debriding, but the rest to follow typically soothed the burn. By the time she applied the last layer, Bjarki had finally risen from the den and, after dispensing and slow up-and-down glance at Alder that bordered on unimpressed - which was more a byproduct of the early hour than any actual judgement - he used his strange hands to piece a scrap of hide around the wound at Solvi's request. A vine similar to the one he'd woven for Alder's necklace loosely held the hide in place, but would certainly unravel if moved much.
Still, it was more than Solvi was able to do with her stiffer paws and teeth. So long as it held the remedies in place for a little while, it would help as a temporary shield. Bjarki unceremoniously turned to his morning foraging in the nearby treetops, leaving the two of them to their own company once more.
She scraped her tongue against her incisors against the bitter taste of the herbs, though she was grateful they robbed her of the coppery tinge of blood. A small mercy.
Her ears cupped toward Alder as his words immediately halted, a kernel of fretfulness worrying she had somehow gotten the wound salve wrong despite months of tutelage and practice. Just as her lips parted to ask if he was uncomfortable, he thanked her.
Solvi's lips bowed into a soft smile instead as she shook her head.
You do not need to thank me,she assured him.
Healing is my purpose, and it is all the better that I can use it to help you.
She studied him quietly for a moment, trying not to be obvious in the way her eyes drank in the dawn's light mingling with the fiery strands of his fur under the guise of a healer's clinical assessment, before tacking on,
But you are welcome. You are always welcome, no matter the time or reason - though I hope you are not injured the next time you call on me.
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Alder - 3/1/2026
His stride, limping and strained as it was, had remained careful. He knew she would have caught him if he stumbled, and Alder also knew he would probably crush her beneath his significant weight if she tried. It wouldn't have done either of them any good to cripple the one healer he knew of within twenty miles.
The glittering stone about his neck bobbed rhythmically with his strained, anxious breaths as Solvi scurried off to her cache. Alder thought it a miracle Cypress hadn't noticed it and torn the thing away from him out of spite.
Although it appeared mostly fine for now, the wound on his leg had grown hotter and angrier in the span of their walk. It was difficult for him to admit, but Alder had a feeling it might have grown infected and potentially dangerous without treatment - for gods only knew what filth laid in the microbiome of his grandfather’s putrid maw. He waited shyly, head down and eyes cast carefully upon the ground in front of him for her return.
She returned quickly.
He was surprised, albeit intrigued by the herbalist’s lesson she provided as she worked. Alder supposed it was a way of familiarizing him with what she was about to do, and he appreciated the effort. It was unlikely he would remember it in the long-term but he still tried hard to look like he was absorbing the information.
It was just so hard to pay attention to her words while she was flitting busily about like a little fey-creature, quick and delicate and so beautiful he could hardly look away.
Uh-huh,he said distractedly, completely oblivious to her own nervousness. Alder liked the way her brow furrowed when she focused. Her eyes scrunched ever so slightly, ears twisting back as she set about her work, the woman’s practiced skill evident in every movement.
Her lips briefly made contact with his limb as she applied the poultice, and the sensation almost sent him into orbit.
A sharp hiss escaped through clenched teeth as he stiffened. Only Alder himself knew whether it was from pain or the shock of her touch; he would never say.
She broke the silence again, responding to his idle chatter regarding the gods and higher power as she sorted through her herbs for the next item on her list. While Alder did not personally ascribe to a particular faith - as yet - he did not necessarily deny the existence of some greater presence that watched over them all, whether it was with a guiding paw or general ambivalence.
His mouth twisted up into a half-smile. Hearing Solvi curse was about as improbable as watching a fish take flight - so far out of the realm of normal, but absolutely delightful nonetheless.
Her characteristic softness made the word 'asshole' sound almost like a compliment.
Alder hardly noticed the burning sensation in his leg. There was as equal a chance it was due to her skill as a healer as it was to his completely diverted attention toward her as a whole - whatever the case, the stinging herbs did not bother him.
Bjarki’s sudden presence gave him a quick jolt. He'd forgotten about her companion up to this point, a quiet shadow following her ministrations; it was a little unnerving watching him work his dexterous little hands so swiftly.
And then it was finished.
Alder lifted the injured limb carefully, then leaned forward to press his weight against it. Already the herbs had begun their work, and the heat he'd felt emanating from the wound earlier seemed cooler, now, likely dampened by the tightly-compacted herb compound.
No,he said gruffly. With his good limb he raised it to put his wrist up against her chin from underneath, gently turning her head to look him in the eye. The sensation of her softness sent electricity up his spine. How fragile she looked, how delicate - like she might shatter into a thousand pieces if he did not hold his breath.
He was definitely holding his breath.
Alder exhaled.
Solvi, despite her appearance, was also one of the strongest wolves he’d ever met.
Thank you.
He forced himself to breathe.
Thank you.
His eyes looked particularly wet. He blinked, and they were clear again.
Thank you. You are… you have done so much for me. Listen, Solvi, I can't stay tonight - but I'll be back. Okay?he did not explain why, but it could be reasonably assumed Alder didn't wish to encroach on the generosity of Dawnbreak's leaders. Anyway, with his leg properly treated, he could make the journey back to Northfall well enough.
When we meet again, I'll - I'll have something to give you. Promise.
He did not know it now, but when he would return to make good on his word, she would not be there.
Or anywhere else.
RE: What am I now that I was then, which I shall suffer and act again - Solvi - 3/7/2026
SKILL : Doctor ( 4 / 5 )
Solvi was grateful Alder either did not sense or was kind enough not to comment on the nervous energy coursing through her. She hadn't possessed this awareness of another before, especially so keenly. At most, she would brace for an aggressive outburst if her patient was disoriented or purely difficult to handle, but she had none of that to worry about with Alder.
No, it was not fear she felt. Quite the opposite.
An ear flicked at his hiss and she offered a murmured apology and a glance for what she perceived as pain. Her heart twinged despite herself, unhappy to cause even involuntary pain for him in the name of mending.
So focused on collecting her own nerves, she failed to not notice his eyes on her the entire time - which was just as well, as she likely would have collapsed in on herself like a dying star. She counted it as a win when she managed to make it through the entire healing process and somehow didn't confess something embarrassing in her dialogue designed to keep her mind moving.
But when it was all finished, such self-made distractions were gone and she couldn't have anticipated his next move.
Alder's paw lifted her chin and her eyes had no choice but to meet his, though they readily sought them out like a compass's draw to the north. She held her breath, her lungs frozen as her heart somehow still managed to hammer against her ribs, making to break out on its own accord. As sure as snow was cold, she knew he would be able to hear it.
He thanked her - not once, not twice, but thrice and she looked from one of his eyes to the other. Her smile strengthened, crinkling her own eyes at the edge as the chokehold his touch had on her dissipated enough that Solvi's body was hers to operate once more.
She wanted to say she would do it all again, many times over, but she didn't get the chance to voice it before he revealed he couldn't stay the night. Solvi's lips parted to object, not wanting him to risk worsening the injury, but the fight went out of her. She had to have faith in her own healing and him, too, and she was sure he wanted for his familiar space to convalesce.
Reluctantly, it dialed back enough for her countenance to soften with curiosity and the promise of his return.
A thrill of uneasiness, as ephemeral as smoke, rose in her chest. She bit back the emotion, attributing it to the nightmare she had woken from when Alder arrived.
It lingered in the background of her mind even as she hastily gathered the remaining herbs into a small skin for him to carry with him and, as he disappeared toward the horizon leading to Northfall, she committed his features to memory.
No, it was not fear she felt. Quite the opposite.
An ear flicked at his hiss and she offered a murmured apology and a glance for what she perceived as pain. Her heart twinged despite herself, unhappy to cause even involuntary pain for him in the name of mending.
So focused on collecting her own nerves, she failed to not notice his eyes on her the entire time - which was just as well, as she likely would have collapsed in on herself like a dying star. She counted it as a win when she managed to make it through the entire healing process and somehow didn't confess something embarrassing in her dialogue designed to keep her mind moving.
But when it was all finished, such self-made distractions were gone and she couldn't have anticipated his next move.
Alder's paw lifted her chin and her eyes had no choice but to meet his, though they readily sought them out like a compass's draw to the north. She held her breath, her lungs frozen as her heart somehow still managed to hammer against her ribs, making to break out on its own accord. As sure as snow was cold, she knew he would be able to hear it.
He thanked her - not once, not twice, but thrice and she looked from one of his eyes to the other. Her smile strengthened, crinkling her own eyes at the edge as the chokehold his touch had on her dissipated enough that Solvi's body was hers to operate once more.
She wanted to say she would do it all again, many times over, but she didn't get the chance to voice it before he revealed he couldn't stay the night. Solvi's lips parted to object, not wanting him to risk worsening the injury, but the fight went out of her. She had to have faith in her own healing and him, too, and she was sure he wanted for his familiar space to convalesce.
I will give you some herbs for the road, just in case,she relented, though she couldn't whisk away the tinge of concern in her gaze. She would always worry, for the stakes of his health were ever so high to her.
Reluctantly, it dialed back enough for her countenance to soften with curiosity and the promise of his return.
It is a promise, then,she echoed, her tail patting the ground steadily.
When we meet again.
A thrill of uneasiness, as ephemeral as smoke, rose in her chest. She bit back the emotion, attributing it to the nightmare she had woken from when Alder arrived.
It lingered in the background of her mind even as she hastily gathered the remaining herbs into a small skin for him to carry with him and, as he disappeared toward the horizon leading to Northfall, she committed his features to memory.