Nothing was right anymore. Nothing had been okay since the day they found their parents locked in their final embrace, and Penny wondered if they ever would be again. The three remaining Nightshade siblings had gone to Uncle Spider in Avon, but Spiderlily wasn't there, never had been. His worry for the sickly sister was intense, but Verbena had become his voice of reason; claiming that rushing out to find her would only spell disaster, that they needed to rest their aching bodies. He didn't agree, his desperation to find their littermate blinding, but he'd learned to trust Benny. She was smart in ways he would simply never be, and he accepted that with grace.
His wait was less so. Pinesprings was barely present, a ghost on the borders suddenly seeming so unsure. The gap between himself and his twin stung, and he hated it, but he didn't know how to mend it either. He just continued to bring food for his brother, to be a silent companion in their shared misery. Penny wondered if his brother blamed them, imagining what it must've been like to watch their parents waste away day by day, but tried not to linger on that thought when he already laid so much blame on himself.

He waited, and he let Verbena rest, and when the time came, he was careful to say tearful goodbyes with promises to return. Never again would he vanish without a word, leaving open ended any sentiment; he'd always worn his heart on his sleeve, but he'd been more vocal about his love for his remaining family members since the loss of so many.

Getting back on the road almost seemed... welcome. A reprieve from the suffocating grief of Elysiums plight and the Nightshades mourning, though he carried a piece of each in his heart.

The hills were nice, he decided. Nothing seemed to be wrong here, and it was nice to just... walk. The obsessive need to rush was lingering in his ribcage like an animal waiting for its chance to break free, fluttering and nervous with a fresh dream to worry about. The newest wave of danger mightve been better concealed than the patches of plagued land they had grown used to, but Pennyroyal knew to fear all. Being wary, he thought, had kept him alive as readily as Verbenas continued support. Speaking of...

Benny, he rumbled softly in pitches too high, not turning to face her as they paced along searching for runes or signs of Spiderlily , Would... can you try to show me how to hunt? Mum and Dad always tried but it never... stuck.

He know how to, in theory, but he could never still his paws enough to place them carefully or without his limbs shaking. He never grew out of his youthful clumsiness, it seemed, though at this point in his life he wondered how much was just.... him, the constant pulse of anxiety, the inability to be confident. Was it even possible for him to grasp his fears long enough to survive, or would he always be a nervous little creature unable to use the gifts of his species?