"Of course, my dear. Take your time. I will follow you anywhere, just say the word" She didn't say anything at first. Just walked, her paws finding the familiar rhythm of earth beneath her, each step a little heavier than the last. The world felt too loud and too still all at once, the kind of silence that rings after something breaks. Ears would stay low, and her tail neutral, but she kept near Tamaska. Drifting slightly closer to feel the warmth of her company.

❝ I keep thinking... ❞ she started, pausing she swallowed thickly and started again. ❝ I keep thinking if I just go back far enough in my head, I can find where it went wrong. Like if I figure it out... it'll hurt less ❞ she had fought so hard to get back to Wardruna, to get back home. But while she was gone, fighting for her life; Wardruna was moving on. Sealing away this part of her life at a speed that both shocked and impressed her.

She also couldn't help but wonder if she had just been a means to an end for her. Only a way to get what she truly wanted — children. And it wasn't that Sheauga hadn't wanted them, but above all else, she just wanted her mate. And she would have chosen her regardless of what she got out of the relationship.

—
❝ speech ❞

The air grew silent between them as the pair continued to walk through the tundra. The sound of the nearby river rushing through the land the only thing that reminded them of where they were. Sheauga shared what was in her heart, wondering if things could have been different with her previous partner. It still hurt to hear the poor woman, so heart broken and shaken. Tamaska had not known the loss of a lover, a partner, but could at least empathize with her for what she had gone through. Yet she still remained silent as Sheauga spilled more of what was on her mind. Perhaps that's all she needed: someone to talk to and just listen.

But Tamaska had to at least try. It was the only thing she could think of to do. Something tells me that you aren't the one to blame. Maybe there were things going on with them that just weren't making things easy for them Maybe they just couldn't think clearly with what ever it was they were going through potentially at that time. You mustn't blame yourself for this. Sometimes things just don't work out. Sometimes there are souls who just aren't meant to be for one reason or another. But that doesn't mean you can't keep going, find love again. There is always hope. Tamaska hoped that she had said the right things, that Sheauga would take her advice to heart and keep moving forward. After all, that's all Tamaska ever wanted for her in the end.

 She listened to every word, being sure not to interrupt while her thoughts raced, letting her friends voice settle into her like a warmth against cold bones. And when Tamaska was done, her steps slowed, I know you're right she murmured softly, and she did mean it. The quiet way of someone who has already turned a truth over a hundred times in her palms and is only just now setting it down I know it in here, she lifted her paw, making a small gesture toward her chest. It just hadn't made it to the rest of me yet I guess

The rivers sound would fill the pause between them. And what scares me the most... her voice would dip low, Is that I'm not even sure she intended to be cruel about it...it just...happened. I was somewhere else surviving, trying to get home — and Mythris kept turning without me she sighed, ears tipping back.

She glanced at Tamaska, something grateful and exhausted behind her eyes.

I don't think I'm going back... she muttered, it was the first time she had just openly said it, without a question lingering behind the words. I think I have known this for a while

—

The pair continued to walk along the river, Tamaska never letting her eyes stray from Sheauga as she spoke. Nothing to be ashamed of. At least you recognize it and can work on self healing. Everything else will come in time.

Sheauga started to slow her pace, the expression on her face telling a story of past hurt and moving forward with the intention of healing. Her next words took some time for the native woman to process, not really sure what to say at this point to make her feel better, as she had not gone through something like this before.

Romance and heartbreak weren't something she had encountered first hand, but was more then willing to accept the challenge. We all do what we must to survive. Maybe she just didn't know if she would ever see you again, and after some time wanted to move on. Not from you, but just the hurt. We do crazy things when we are hurt. Not that I am defending what she did. Only giving a possible perspective on the matter.

Tamaska saw Sheauga look back up at her, exhaustion plain as day on her face. A statement of going back to her old pack came next. Perhaps this is a bit selfish of me, so forgive me. But I'm rather glad you aren't. Now I can have you all to myself. A bright affectionate smile lit up on Tamaska's face, trying to lighten the mood, followed by a soft tail wag.

 The smile would catch her off guard, and she blinked, something in her face doing something it hadn't done in some time. It wasn't a full smile, but the very first hint of one the real ones that start somewhere behind the eyes.

Perhaps you're right, she mused first, her voice thoughtful turning Tamaska's perspective over gently. It didn't make it easier. It doesn't make it hurt less, but it does make me feel...less like something done to me and more like something that just happened...between two people who were both lost she allowed the silence to settle.

All to yourself? she inquired with a smirk, and a quiet lilt of disbelief. As though I'm something worth keeping it wasn't exactly self pity, but more like someone reading an inscription they weren't sure was meant for them. And the more she thought about it, the more her tail lifted. Swaying in a low tentative arc, You always know the right thing to say

She paused, tan ears coming up, So, where will we be going then? she would need to say a proper goodbye to Wardruna before she departed, and officially close this chapter of her life. She needed the closure if she was to move on.

—

No matter the words she used to try and comfort her, it didn't take away the feeling of pain she felt for her friend. I'm not so sure about being right. Only saying what it feels like from the outside looking in. I'm only sorry that this happened in the first place, to both of you if I'm so bold to say so. Forgive me if I have gone a bit too far there. Tamaska gave a slight apologetic smile, worried that Sheauga might take that comment the wrong way. She did return the smirk however, happy that she could get some happiness pulled out of her racoon wolf.

Of course you are. You just don't see it yet. A glint of something akin to mischief and flirting shone in her honeyed gaze, a wave of her tail moving side to side in a playful manner. Tamaska wasn't really sure what to say about her last comment, unsure of whether she really knew all of the right things to say in times of hardship. Such wisdom wasn't just plopped on to one person. No, it was hidden inside each of them. They simply just had to dig deep to find it. As for where to go?

I have a friend who is a part of a group of some sort. Not really a true pack yet so to speak. But they are an interesting bunch. Nate is kind but a bit aloof. Very friendly once you get to know him. We will be heading to the bright flame a bit further east from here. But he is on a scouting mission in the south for now, while we wait for him.

She turned to look at Sheauga as she spoke, wondering how she would take all of this information. Have anything you would like or need to do before we go? Do you still want to come with me? There was a worry in her voice for a split second, wondering if Sheauga had any last minute thoughts about staying with her. Cold feet if you will.

 She listened to the apology first, No, she said simply, Don't apologize for that, her gaze would find Tamaska's, You're right to have compassion for her too. And, it helps...knowing someone can hold space for both of us at once. the woman exhaled slowly through her nose. She let that sit for only a moment before Tamaska's expression shifted; that glint, that mischief and Sheauga felt the warmth of it land somewhere it hadn't been expected. Her ears tilted sideways.

You sound very certain she murmured the ghost of something playful threading through her voice, her tail which had lifted earlier moved again.

Then came the details, Nate, the bright flame, and heading east. Sheauga listened carefully, ears tracking forward as a thoughtful crease moved across her brow. When Tamaska turned to look at her with a small worried note slipping into her voice, Sheauga met her eyes without flinching.

There is one thing I need to do first she mused. I need to go back to the Northfall; not to stay but...I owe Wardruna a proper goodbye. She deserves to hear it from me, and I deserve to be the one who says it. she paused and then.

Then I am all yours,


—

There had been only silence coming from Tamaska as she listened whole heartedly to Sheauga's side. There was so much pain and exhaustion coming from her, enough to bend the world to its knees. But it was all understandable and also something that could, with enough time, heal all wounds from existence. There was a heavy weight in her chest at the talk of going back to Northfall, to Wardruna. She knew why it had to be done, but it didn't mean she had to like it.

Shall I wait for you just outside of Northfall? I don't want to be a sore spot between you too, as I think that my presence would only meddle with things for you both. Even if the thought of Sheauga leaving her side for the slightest amount of time, made her weak and sick to the stomach. But why was that? For now, the answer wasn't entirely clear.