It seemed perfectly reasonable to keep his face smashed into her neck during this exchange. If he never withdrew, he wouldn't have to see her face. Would she be horrified? Disgusted? Confused, even? What if she had no idea? What if he had misinterpreted every signal of hers up to this point and fallen into the trap so many men fell victim to - the friend zone?

Alder's thundering heartbeat was so loud in his ears, he almost didn't hear her response.

Forever.

He blinked, lashes brushing against her soft fur in surprise as he remained wholly engulfed in her nape like a scared child.

She reached over to plant an affectionate and feather-light kiss at the corner of his mouth, and Alder thought he was going to die (if he wasn't already dead). Surely his heart had stopped several moments ago right after his confession, and now this was the golden afterlife where his spirit would forever indulge in its own version of paradise. Without realizing it, he'd been trembling like a leaf - slowly, agonizingly he withdrew from the warm safety of her neck, and looked down at her with an expression close to terrified wonder.

Shit. He didn't think he would get this far.

Solvi continued to speak, saying all the right things, all of the things he had ever wanted to hear from her lips and more, and while she did so Alder very slowly and very carefully raised his paw and bit it. Four small pinpricks of blood pooled at the surface of his skin, spreading and staining the fur around them as he watched.

Not dead.

Not dead, he repeated aloud by way of explanation. Alder suddenly looked sheepish, feeling his cheeks grow fire-hot. Sorry, uh. Was checking.

Alder glanced again at the tiny blobs of blood welling at the back of his paw as though they held the secrets of the universe.

They might as well have.

The realization struck him all over again with enough force to make his stomach lurch violently within his gut. His ears burned even hotter; he became acutely aware of every point of contact between them. Solvi's warmth pressed against him, the brush of her fur, the lingering ghost of her kiss still tingling at the corner of his mouth like holy fire.

He swallowed, hard.

Meanwhile Solvi looked awfully composed for someone who had just casually altered the trajectory of his entire existence.

Alder's gaze shifted away from hers for half a second before immediately snapping back, as if incapable of pulling away for even a fraction of a moment now that he finally had permission to look, to devour her with his eyes. His expression softened into something both shy and absurdly affectionate, the corners of his lips twitching up into a hesitant smile despite himself.

Forever, he echoed back, testing the shape of the word. Yeah.

Forever.

Then, because apparently what was left of his brain had abandoned him completely, Alder released a nervous chuckle; breathless, nervous, still disbelieving. You know, he said, glancing down toward his paws. I had a whole speech prepared for this if it went. You know, wrong. I practiced it for three days, had the thing memorized like a reflex.

His eyes shifted back up.

I don't remember any of it now.

His tail twitched behind him in obvious embarrassment. For the one million, two hundred and eighty-seven thousand, four hundred and sixth time in his life, Alder had absolutely nothing clever to say. He looked at her stupidly. Blindly. Totally awash with love.

Alder moved closer without thinking, shoulder brushing against hers as his eyes searched every inch of her own sage-green gaze with hungry want. When he spoke again, his voice had softened, quiet but more confident as a totally different feeling began to take hold - a feeling he had long suppressed in her presence, a great need, like a starving wolf dying of thirst beside a river he had always believed himself forbidden to drink from.

So... he paused, suddenly finding a nearby clover deeply fascinating. Do it. Ask it. This is your chance. Do you maybe... want to continue this conversation somewhere... else?

His ears pinned back immediately afterward, regretting the words the instant they left his mouth. Fuck. Fuck. Alder, what? Really? My guy? Right now?

I mean - not for - any reason, he sputtered, Not, uh. Weirdly.

Alder grimaced.

That sounded significantly weirder out loud.

He paused again, and a sheepish smile began to creep across his tormented expression.

I just... want to stay with you a little longer. That's all.