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She had never known loneliness before, isolation or how the hollow in her chest burned. She missed her mom, missed her sisters ─ missed the life they had and it ate away like acid in her heart. And as the days turned into weeks the reality that she may never be able to see them again; or that they may truly not want her became all too clear. They lived in her memories though, and she lingered along the edges of the meadow, looking longingly into the open expanse of earth for a glimpse of them. That they might come; that they might have been worried all along. Might be relieved to see her alive and well. Might dote over her and litter her face with kisses and love her like they once had.

But she was met with silence, the wind the only caress as it tousled her fur. Eidola was growing, faster now than before; her legs growing longer - features narrowing and gradually becoming more feminine as she transitioned; it was slow but she was shedding baby fat for muscle. The girls nose was pitched toward the meadows purple eyes locked with hope when the rains began, sprinkling at first before erupting into a full downpour, drenching her coat before too long.

Still she sat there, even as her fur became waterlogged and it ran off her nose. And as the thunder gently rolled above her; it was nice ─ like the sky was mourning for her. With her.

❝ speech ❞

Her lanky legs would thump one paw after another, Illithya was on a mission! Not long ago she was sticking her nose in random burrows, asking rather loudly if anyone was home, she was looking for a new secret spot for her special prettiest of pretty collection! And it had to be big enough to fit Nanna, mama, Aisling and all her shiny pebbles! This made the search extra difficult, however she figured if she squashed them in there together they’d fit just fine.. probably..

But secret spot finding wasn’t the current mission at paw! When she had originally been snuffing out places, she heard something, it was strange, like a whisper in the wind or something. She wondered a few times if it was a bird trying to prank her or something, but she didn’t see any, she would know, she was quite good at spotting them and asking if they had anything shiny for a trade of something like a flower or berry, they always just squawked at her and flew away, it was a shame really, though one day she knew she’d succeeded! The actual mission at paw now was following these voices. She knew she wasn’t supposed to go far, and she also figured it probably would’ve been best to tell mama, but it felt important! Toooo important to waste any time!

She was unaware just where these voices were leading her, unaware who or where they were even coming from. They created something like a string in her, gently pulling her forward, it wasn’t forceful or anything, and she hadn’t felt scared of the result of following whatever it was. She didn’t find it hard to follow the pull, however what she DID find hard was staying focused! She could see little glimmers of what could be the most shiniest thing known to wolves out the corners of her eyes and it took absolutely everything in her to not venture off to investigate, though Thia was determined! She would stay focused! Something counted on it.

So as she passed shimmering something’s, and even as the rain began to dampen her fur; She. Stayed. FOCUSED.. and.. and SERIOUS!

Well until her wiggling nose picked something up, it was.. familiar, very familiar! She knew this smell, maybe more than any other smell! In seconds her white tipped tail turned into a blurry line, and as if it jumped started her, she was off. She didn’t quite care for the tug in her chest, whether it was there anymore or gone completely, as important as it might’ve been, nothing was more important than THIS.

Serious Illithya was now a thing of the past, now she was a bounding brown blur of giggles and pants. Her lanky limbs would take her as fast as they could.. maybe too fast! She had yet to learn to stop without crashing into something, maybe today would be a start..? Eh.. maybe not.

She could recognize that pretty soggy fur pile anywhere! It was her sister! "EEEIIDOOOLAAAAA" Her voice carried from a near whisper to a shouting volume, the norm for her, maybe a little louder than the usual excited octave. She came hurdling forward, not quite thinking to slow down ahead of time instead of right in front of her. She didn’t quite want to crash into her sister, so instead she hopped over her, now finding herself diving into the ground and rolling straight onto her back. "Eidola!" She barked expectingly, her blue and orange eyes looking over her soggy sister from the upside down view that only made her giggle. "Eidy you look silly from here!" The pup chirped before quickly putting herself upright and shaking her fur.

By now she was also a soggy gal, her lynx tufts causing the tips of her ears to slightly flop over. She trotted over to her sister with a bright smile, her tongue loosely hanging from the side of her mouth with a huff. "Eidola I missed you!" She stated in a nearly scolding tone. " We came back and you guys were gone and I was waiting for you to come back, but you never did! And I wanted to tell you about the fighting party and the snow and and the new patches of grass and my shiny pebbles!!" The pup rambled on, pacing back and forth as she did so. "You and Papa and Kyros..! You’ve all been gone for sooooo long! And and..-"

Finally she paused, looked down at her sister and tilted her crown which only made her ears flop completely to the side. "Oh Eidy, you’re gonna get sniffles if you just keep lying in the rain like this!" She chuckled playfully before stepping over her and looking down to make sure at least her head was covered. Her sister looked a bit different.. she was longer maybe..? And not so round as before! This only proved she was gone for far longer than she needed to be! "Now where was I.."

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"EEEIIDOOOLAAAAA" It was as if her prayers had been answered, the young girls head bobbed up from its hunched and lonely stance, ears swiveling as the familiar vocals seemed to ricochet off the very mountains in the distance. Both ears came forward as she saw the blur of earthen tones. And she knew there was only one, only one who resembled the forests so perfectly. She moved like a speeding bullet; and the soggy girl knew she better lower her height before her sister barreled right into her. As if rehearsed, Eidola ducked just as Illithya bound over her. The girls head swung wildly, purple eyes lighting up; she couldn't believe it. She was here? Why was she here? Why wasn't she with mother?

❝ Illithya! ❞ she beamed, her heavy tail swishing against the mud. "Eidola!" she laughed, a smile sweeping away her melancholy. "Eidy you look silly from here!" she smirked as her sister quickly righted herself ─ lifting a paw and squinting one eye to avoid the water spray while Eidola gave her own short shake of her head to free some of the water from her face. "Eidola I missed you!" she did? Eidola blinked, audits tucking back slightly as the melancholy swept back over her like an old friend. "We came back and you guys were gone and I was waiting for you to come back, but you never did! And I wanted to tell you about the fighting party and the snow and and the new patches of grass and my shiny pebbles!!" she only stared, "You and Papa and Kyros..! You’ve all been gone for sooooo long! And and..-"

did...did they not know? Her maw parted, but she was cut short, clamping it shut promptly.

"Oh Eidy, you’re gonna get sniffles if you just keep lying in the rain like this!" and then she was clambering over top of her to shield her from the rain. ❝ Well now you are, ❞ she countered with a smirk. "Now where was I.." ❝ Illi... ❞ she muttered softly. ❝ Illi I left 'cause mama doesn't want me, I ─ I've been so hurt ever since mama and papa split up; papa wasn't allowed to be around us anymore or be there when we went to sleep or woke up...and no one even really seemed to care..and mama...Illi she won't even talk to me; she doesn't even care that I've been sad ❞ dark ears fell flat against her crown, her purple eyes casting to the ground.

❝ speech ❞

”Illi” Her ramblings came to a sputtering stop whilst her sister called her name. Eidy didn’t talk that loud, not like her, she wouldn’t be able to hear her if she kept talking, so instead, of course, she listened intently, not wanting the miss the traveling words of her much lower octave sister. "Hurt?? Did someone chomp you? Where?! I’ll find Kyros and get Nausicaa, they’ll get ‘em!" Her voice was abrupt and glistening with a new found concern.. well until she let her sister continue. Ohh, she wasn’t talking about an outside hurt, but an inside one instead, ehh.. she didn’t quite get the inside hurts much, but apparently in this case they were caused by mama..? No; Mama and Papa. Just what was all this mess her sister was spewing? Mama not wanting her?? And papa not being able to see us anymore..? That would explain why they hadn’t seen him in so long.. This was all so confusing, she didn’t know where to start!

Illithya gave a deep huff, her head angling itself to look down at her. "Well I don know about mama, but I do know about me, and III know I care! I care about you being sad, and I cared even more when you disappeared! I was really sad when I couldn’t show you all my new rocks.. but I’m okay now cuz I found you!" Not that she ever thought her sister was in any kind of danger, she was much too optimistic for those kinds of things!

By now she was as wet as a fish! Nose dripping fresh rain water and ears heavy as much as they were soggy with the same contents. She didn’t quite know what else to say, though through the bantering sides of her ever racing mind, she finally settled on what she thought was a good starting point. "Eidy did mama say that? Did she say she didn’t want you?" She figured this was a good place to start, a question, and a good one at that!

The little pup didn’t often understand the hesitant looks her sister would give, or the huffs and puffs she’d release every so often. She couldn’t decipher what was going on up there behind those purple eyes, beneath a surface level that is.

Over their shared time together she’d slowly developed an Eidy sense! Like if she was too hesitant to come out the den, there was nothing a little push and convincing wouldn’t solve, or when she was laying in her own little corner, she would join her, and fill the space with her voice of whatever her day consisted of. It wasn’t a hard thing to do, and she didn’t mind not one bit! She didn’t know it, but in a way Eidola helped her slowly down a bit, even quiet down a notch if only to be able to hear her comments.

For a moment she began to think back to her special pretty pile, the earlier mission at paw before another came along. She now wondered just how big she’d need to make her next one for her sister. She hadn’t met Nanna yet, and she didn’t quite like strangers.. hmm.. perhaps digging a completely new one for her would do the trick? She never quite thought of stashing her sister away, of course she was as pretty as the rest of her collection, though she always imagined they’d admire them together, however it was most apparent that this moment now sealed the deal! She needed to be stored away safely, with a BUNCHA space so she had plenty of corners to choose from. She definitely needed her own special place, she was the most precious in her collection after all! In her little burrow she’d stay happy, and not feel so heavy all the time, Illithya would make it happen!! In fact she was determined now more than ever!

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"Hurt?? Did someone chomp you? Where?! I’ll find Kyros and get Nausicaa, they’ll get ‘em!" Eidola's ears flickered back. ❝ Nau...Nau was mean to me too ❞ she muttered, a half broken whisper. Mean to her where she never had been before, just because she was wanted dad. Illi was a good listener, even if she didn't understand the level of emotion that she did. Kyros didn't really either she thought, but Kyros supported her regardless.

"Well I don know about mama, but I do know about me, and III know I care! I care about you being sad, and I cared even more when you disappeared! I was really sad when I couldn’t show you all my new rocks.. but I’m okay now cuz I found you!" her soggy tail would thump, making a wet slapping sound as it hurt the earth and she cocked her head to smile at her sister. ❝ I care about you too Illi...I missed you ❞ she hummed, aiming to bump her head against her sisters. ❝ I want to see all your new rocks ❞ she added on with a grin.

"Eidy did mama say that? Did she say she didn’t want you?" she only stared at her sister for a moment, ❝ Well ─ no. B-but she didn't have to say it. How she's been treating me says it ❞ she paused, hoping that she would understand, and then purple eyes found her sisters mismatched ones. ❝ ...When was the last time Mom actually spent time with you? You know...just you. Has she ever asked you if you're ok after everything? Or if you miss dad? Or if you have any questions? Or even wanted to see your new rocks? ❞ she asked the question, but she could already guess the answer.

Never.

❝ speech ❞

She let out a soft snort, a quiet giggle bubbling from her throat. "That doesn’t mean she wouldn’t help if someone chomped you, silly!" She would defend her younger sister lightly, finding the thought quite silly. Nausicaa was a bit bigger than them, and she had the positive notion that she would defend them if needed! Especially with that love of sticks she has, the big ones to be specific, on top of witnessing first paw her courageous fight against another pup at the fighting party, she hadn’t won, but that was completely besides the point!

Regardless Illithya stand and listen to her sister through the pitter pattering of the rain overhead, at this rate, she would likely have the sniffles she so bravely covered her sister from, but it was okay! She quite liked the sound, it was silly, and kept her body doing something. Though slowly, her paws would find themselves slipping beneath the now softened earth, mud darkening the whites of her paws until she was completely splooted across the back of her sister. She’d be giggling and splashing mud against Eidola if she wasn’t particularly caught of her trailing words.

"Eidy, mamas not a butterfly yknow??" She barked, her dueled gaze meeting the shiny purple ones she oh so wanted to store away. "Butterflies can’t talk, so they fly away or they come to ya if they like ya" She started, her white tipped tail batting from side to side once more. "Mama can talk, so you can’t just think something off one part like you would a butterfly! What if she did it on accident and you just don’t know cause she hasn’t been able to say anything?" She did her best to understand, and she tried even harder to get her point across also.

Illithya cared for her family deeply, and it hurt her to see everyone in such a mess, and from the looks of it, everyone was just assuming stuff! In her eyes nothing was final unless it was said with a voice; If you just assumed no one would want to play with you, how would you make friends??

Again her sister continued, and this time her ears would fall back and her tail would slow its happy pace. Had mama asked if she was okay with everything? No, but she also didn’t really want to bring it up, everyone was already so sad because of it, why bring it up again??

She would much rather spend her time looking for places to put everyone to keep them happy, safe and tucked away. Illithya had a hard time understanding just why her sister had such a strong connection to these things, where she chose to move past, her sister would stay buried in the moment. "Well of course I miss papa! And of I had any questions I’d ask, and.. and no she hasn’t seen them, but that’s because I wanted to keep them a surprise! These were a special collection; I pick them out, you see them, I show them to everyone else afterwards and thennn I put them away in their special place!" It was a very serious process!

She hoped she’d answer all the questions accordingly, correctly even, there were so many at once! Illithya didn’t know what to say to make everything better, if there was a magic word to be found, she’d go searching right away! But maybe her sister didn’t exactly need a magic word..? Not right now at least. "I’m not too sure how to make you feel better.." She huffed dejectedly, plopping her head down beside her sisters, her body relaxing across the one below her. "But I won’t leave you here alone either! It was a bad mistake for mama to make you feel like this, it hurt your feelings and she should probably say sorry.." She barked quietly, her ears soon perking once more, and her soft smile returning. "I won’t make a mistake like that though! I’ll never hurt your feelings Eidy, I promise!"

No, she wasn’t as in tune with such emotions that caused everything to come tumbling down, her blissful ignorance is likely what’s kept her as bright and optimistic as she was, though she didn’t have to understand her sister to support her, so that’s exactly what she’d do! She wouldn’t leave her sister, not now or ever..! Well at least until papa came back for her.. she’d have to go home sometime, who would tell mama to make up with Eidy if not her??

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Illi was so full of life, unburdened by the things that troubled Eidola's young mind. "That doesn’t mean she wouldn’t help if someone chomped you, silly!" in a way she envied her, a ear pivoting and her nose angling toward her as her sister laughed. "Eidy, mamas not a butterfly yknow??" she rose a brow, confusion littering her face. But she waited patiently for her sister to finish getting the thought out. "Butterflies can’t talk, so they fly away or they come to ya if they like ya" right...  "Mama can talk, so you can’t just think something off one part like you would a butterfly! What if she did it on accident and you just don’t know cause she hasn’t been able to say anything?" she hadn't really thought about it that way. But the crushing fear of what Mama could say was overwhelming. Too scar for her. Purple eyes cast to the soggy grass, water pooling around her toes.

"Well of course I miss papa! And of I had any questions I’d ask, and.. and no she hasn’t seen them, but that’s because I wanted to keep them a surprise! These were a special collection; I pick them out, you see them, I show them to everyone else afterwards and thennn I put them away in their special place!" ❝ Papa misses you too I bet, Mama won't let him come into the meadows anymore ❞ she mused thoughtfully, unsure if her sisters even knew why their father was away.

"I’m not too sure how to make you feel better.." she gave her a sad smile, ❝ ...that's ok, ❞ she assured her softly. "But I won’t leave you here alone either! It was a bad mistake for mama to make you feel like this, it hurt your feelings and she should probably say sorry.." Eidola nodded somberly. "I won’t make a mistake like that though! I’ll never hurt your feelings Eidy, I promise!" she smiled, tail thumping as she reached forward to boop her sisters nose with her own. ❝ You and Kyros are the best sisters, ❞ she hummed.

She thought for a moment, before ❝ ...Hey Illi? ❞ she began. ❝ Why don't you come with me? I'm not stayin' here...I gotta go back to Kyros and papa ─ but...I don't wanna go without you ❞ she held her breath, pitching her ears back at the fear that she might say no and her family might be reduced again to just the three of them.

❝ speech ❞

Her mixed match eyes would squint with her laughter, finding the soggy bump of noses carrying a rather funny feeling. "You’re the best too Eidy!" She mused, her crown tilting and her ears flopping once more to her name being called. Go back with her? Not to the meadows but to wherever papa and Kyros was, there wasn’t much to think about here, well not intensely at least. All she could ponder about, for now at least; was seeing her loved ones once more, even if it was for a little bit. "Of course I’ll come with you Eidy! I miss Kyros and papa, plus I wouldn’t just let you walk in the rain all by yourself!"

It’d been far too long since she’d seen them, she missed talking with papa and playing with their eldest sister, she wondered if they changed, gotten bigger and longer like Eidy, a bigger papa would certainly be a sight, a very funny one at the least. "Let’s go, let’s go, let’s gooo!" She chirped, a giggle lacing within her banter. With that she hurriedly stood to her paws and gave playful, eager jumps.

She was now following her sister, shoulder to shoulder past the trees, and further from the meadow, though now she couldn’t help but think of what had been mentioned earlier. 'Mama won’t let him come into the meadows anymore..' Just what was that about?

"Eidy, did mama and papa have a fight? Like.. a really BIG one?" She questioned lightly, her excitement bubbling down with her fresher passing thoughts. To Illithya she figured this was nothing more than a small field trip with an extra special destination, but what she hadn’t understood is why. Why were her parents fighting? Would they ever make up?? There were too many areas she couldn’t quite fill the blanks for, and her perfect solution to such problems were to ask! She’d ask papa, and maybe mama too when she got back home..

Illi knew she wasn’t supposed to go this far out from the meadow, but this was important too!! She wanted to be there for her sister, and visit her father and Kyros, mama would understand that right? Of course she would! Why wouldn’t she?

The thought of her consequences were now but a thing of the past, she had a soggy field trip to attend to!